Always alone.

I always felt like if I went missing no one would look for me except my mom. She would notice I was gone, she would miss me and she would look for me. Walking through crowds I feel like I could suddenly vanish into thin air and no one would notice, flinch or even skip a beat. No one would even take the time to notice I was gone much less try to find me.

Does she know what happened? When her soul left her body did she see what had happened? Did she feel guilty? Did she feel sad? Did they show her the play by play in heaven? Or did she wake up in heaven and forget it all? Eric says when her soul left her body she saw what happened. Did she feel abandoned? Does she feel any pain?

Did it take this for her to be able to see how loved she is? To see how much she meant to all of us? Even though she always felt like she wasn't as amazing as we all told her she is. I miss the way when you walked in the door she was come out of the kitchen and jump up and down smiling and giggling so happy to see you. I miss her smell, the way her hands feel in mine, the way she always made me feel better.

Life isn't about money. It's about love. You can die tomorrow with all the money in the world and you can't take it with you and no one will remember you just how much money you had and who has it now. Love.....Love doesn't end, it doesn't die with death....it amplifies. Love is forever even after your heart stops beating. Love is part of your character, your entire being, even when I die and meet my mom again the love will only be stronger. It never goes away.