Tired is an understatement

So we went out of our way to send out these announcements to friends and family because people who knew were requesting them and people who didn't needed to know. Then what? 100 sent our and we got a gift or card from 10......wow...thanks guys, way to show love and support. I am so FUCKING tired of people. Fuck everyone! Send us a card that says congrats....anything!

We spent the last 2 weekends going to Redlands to pick up stuff that we wanted before my dad threw it away. OF COURSE my sister took the TV, freezer, hutch all the big ticket items. Granted I wanted more sentimental things like her robe, slippers, photo albums. The things that upsets me so much is my sisters husbands makes 6 figures a year and she doesn't even ask or consider anyone else she is just out for herself. If my dad offers me ANYTHING I say well ask Stacy first if she wants it I don't want to take something she wants. NOPE can't get common decency in return. She is religious and always acts like she wants to always do the right thing but she doesn't give a fuck about anyone else but herself. I am shocked at how she has acted since all of this happened. I really just don't want these people around me, it only bums me out to see my own family being manipulative selfish pricks!

The day we found out she had died, who was there? me.....all by myself. Like I was the last 3 times she had to go to the hospital, I visited her all the time, cleaned her house, took her shopping, was always there! I had to sit there and talk to police and coroners and EMS. Stacy didn't even come, my dad was on the road. I was there dealing with it all alone. Then she feels entitled to take whatever she wants with no regard? I am just fucking tired.

If my mom felt like this from my sister and my dad no fucking wonder she was so unhappy. It's not fucking healthy. Its such a huge toll on my soul. I am sad, sad, sad, sad and Disgusted at people. I feel like the only thing that I lived to protect and help is gone. I am so hurt and lost and the family I am left with .....I would trade for my mom in heart beat.